silverneedles | ximilia inbox

[ he's largely convinced himself that this isn't a dream, but that doesn't mean much. it's all so far beyond his scope of understanding that it's curved back around into making sense and that in itself should be more alarming than it is. he's been dead already. here, at least, it doesn't hurt. yet. and while the machinations themselves are foreign, the intent is familiar: food, shelter, security. they're safe, whoever they all are, himself included among them.

maybe he shouldn't let his guard down so easily. there's proof enough that some of the past has followed through to this place: his shijie, inexplicably alive and whole. perhaps it should be enough to tell him that someone else might follow too, that the mask at his hip might be necessary, but the whole of it is overwhelming enough that hiding himself has dropped in his list of priorities. it turns out it wouldn't have mattered, because he's never needed to hide from wen qing.

it's happened before, the way their eyes meet from across the room. he remembers it. but this is a communal place to eat, like an army barracks, strangers moving from one place to another with unknown agendas, and wen qing herself is still a beacon in their midst and she's all he sees. she's dead, she's dead, she's dead, but aren't they all? is that what this place is?

he doesn't remember closing the distance, but suddenly she's within arm's reach and he's wrapping her in his own without thinking, without breathing, crushing her to his chest like she might fade away like the ghost she is in his mind if he doesn't hold on this time. ]

Edited (formatting is fake) 2021-07-04 21:27 (UTC)

[ Wen Qing doesn't see him at first.

She's in a mess hall and she knows she should be getting something to eat, figuring out how to cook something, what all of this food and these new gadgets that she'll have to learn eventually. But there's exhaustion creeping in that makes her just want to return to her room and sleep, or figure out a way out so she can resume her hunt for her brother. Or maybe adapt to the idea that she's clearly dead now. Anything, other than eating; the thought of food makes her stomach turn. How can she eat now?

A quick turn, with the intent to go back to her room, and she spots Wei Wuxian. How he's there she has no idea, but he's there, he there, and then she's pressed against his chest. She should question it, she thinks, ask what and why and who does he think he is, but it's Wei Wuxian, and she knows him. She sinks into his hold, surprised at the strength with which he's holding her, considering the state she last saw him, what she had to do to him. He helped win a war, she knows from rumor on the street, but otherwise—

No matter. Wei Wuxian is a friend, even now, even here, and she clutches him, eyes filling with tears at the relief of seeing a friendly face, drawing in a shakey, shuddering breath. ]

[ they're not people who hug. wen qing specifically is prickles all the way down and there are certain lines that he knows shouldn't be crossed--though whether or not he adheres to them is something else entirely. but here she'll have to forgive him his moment of weakness, he just needs to hold on and convince himself that she's as tangible and real as the rest of them are.

of the maelstrom in his chest, it's hard to say which emotion is loudest. relief, in a way he'll never be able to explain. fear, that she's here, too. anger, so deep and dark he's afraid to look at it head on. but the relief sweeps up through that, too, and he's sure he'll crush her before he lets her go anyway, so does it really matter? ]

Wen Qing.

[ it's more plea than the admonishment he'd meant it to be. wen ning was alive after all, though now he's not sure he'll have the opportunity to go find him again. is it really so strange that she'd survived the hands of the jin, too? ]

Ai, where have they kept you locked away?

[ There's no reason for Wei Wuxian to hug her, but she puts it down to the strange place they're in now, this world that isn't a world, unimaginable stars she can't name in the skies outside the windows and objects she can't yet place. There's no reason for her to hug him, either, and she puts the comfort from the hug in the same category. He's a familiar face in a place she doesn't understand, someone who knows her, who knows her brother.

The thought of him stops her short and she jerks, attempting to put some space between them, although with how tightly he's holding her, it's not really possible. ]

Wei Wuxian, please— [ He words feel thick on her tongue, the tears she's been fighting for months welling in her eyes. ] I need to get home, you have to help me. I left A-Ning and I can't find him anywhere.

[ Something in the way she words it immediately sets off an itch at the back of his mind, something familiar and not at the same time. He knows this desperation from her intimately, in agonizing moments where he's been allowed to see what she won't share with other people, in those late nights where they've had to figure out how to beat misery and desperation back to support the people important to them. He knows it and yet it's shaped differently now. Or shaped too much the same?

Nothing makes sense anymore. Everything feels out of order and he's not sure if can attribute it to just dying--something bigger is at play here, especially if his sister is anything to go by.

He doesn't let her go as far as she'd maybe like, but some part of him is almost afraid she might bolt if he does. His heart thuds slow in his chest and he catches her face in his hands instead, holding her steady so he can study her face, the fear, the tears. Wen Qing doesn't cry without reason. ]

A-Qing. [ I saw him just before I came here. He doesn't know if he's okay or if something has been done to him or if he's been kept in those chains for all these years, but surely Wen Qing should know, shouldn't she? Or have some idea. ] When did you see him last? Did he get free on his own? Did you?

[ The familiarity of A-Qing is unusual but this entire thing has been surreal, so it's easy to dismiss it. Besides, there's an important question she needs to answer. ]

Months. It's been— they sent me to another city and when I came back, he was gone. I don't know what's happened to him, or any of the others.

[ It's been months since she last saw any of her kin, with the attendant worry pressing her down, weighing heavily on her shoulders, between the war and then the uncertainty of what would happen after. They were Wen's, after all, even if their branch had been doctors for generations.

She clutches Wei Wuxian's arms, trying to blink back tears, but seeing him is such a relief she can't help but cry. Of everyone she knows, Wei Wuxian's the one most likely to understand her need to see her brother safe and protected, and he's clever enough to figure something out. ] Do you know anything?

[ His mind is working too slowly for this. He can sense all the important pieces of information as they slip by him, but plucking them out of the air and arranging them in any kind of order feels like a trick he might have played before, and now he's old and tired and the clever thoughts are a trickle instead of a torrent. Months? Months. Months where, though? ]

He's--

[ Not okay. Okay-ish? He was Ghost General through and through when he'd seen him last, humanity buried somewhere beneath instinct. But he's alive (ish) and in one piece and that's far better than Wei Wuxian had believed. Another question without answers? The Jins had claimed them dead, and now he has proof both lived?

His hands drop to her shoulders, brow knitting itself as his understanding fractures. ] They said you both were dead, did they not kill you?

[ Dead. His words make her heart sink, breath catching in her throat, and she can't help one of the stray tears that finally falls, only for her to reach up and wipe it away with the sleeve of her robe, struggling to put forth a strong face, and answer the question Wei Wuxian's asking of her.

She dies too, it sounds like. Unsurprising, considering how far the Wen clan fell, and her connection to her uncle. But no, she hasn't been killed yet. Even before this— ] They sent me to another city and I had to leave a-Ning and the others. Who said we were both dead?

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